New Years Resolutions

Resolve: To reach a decision or to make a determination.

When it comes to New Years Resolutions, I decided a few years ago to "Resolve not to resolve". I know that sounds crazy, but my emotional well-being often gets the better of me. So, to save me from being hard on myself, I just decided this was the way to go. I mean, come on, how many of us actually keep our resolutions for the new year? I'd say, maybe 99.9% of the population. So, yeah, that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

God's funny, you know? I think He sometimes tries to speak to me in a still, soft voice, but I'm too busy being busy that I don't hear Him. So, He has to use other methods. I learn through repetition. Always have. Always will. I don't know why it surprises me when He wants me to learn a concept, that He'll continually bring a theme up, in several different avenues. Today wasn't any different. This below quote was sent to me twice today... which I believe to be no accident. I figured if I'm to learn this lesson, then you all should too!

A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her. Unknown Author

Wow. That's pretty profound if you think about it. I think.... as much as I don't want to admit this, I want to *make a dertermination* to impliment this in my life. (Somehow that sounds better, than a resolution. Semantics, I know.)

I'm not real happy about where my life is right now. This past year flew by and honestly, I don't have much to show for it. My Walk with Him is definitely misplaced. I'm all out of sorts. The person I thought I'd be, isn't who I am now. If you'd asked me, say 10 years ago, where I'd be now, it would be different than the reality of now. While I realize everything is in God's timing and His way are not our ways.... I still long for what I do not have. However, I don't want something just to have it. I don't want to be married if I'm going to be miserable. I don't want another job, if it's not where I'm supposed to be. Contentment is the name of the game. (Not that this is a game, mind you, but I think you know what I mean.)

When I was prophisized over a few years ago, I was told, amoung other things, that I needed to be chasing after God. And in my pursuit of Him, everything else would fall into place. It's sadly funny how I can't seem to get this concept down. Everything tends to be an uphill battle with me. You'd think I'd learn. My life tends to be like a roller coaster, up and down, up and down.... and sometimes, flat-lined. I know this isn't how He'd want me to live.

Good grief. I'm sure I'm making this more complicated than it has to be.....